Eyyo! it's been a while now, almost 3 months of hiatus. Another shot of too much feeling and thinking has led me to checking up on my blog. As of college almost comes to an end, which mean yes Im gonna graduate soon. YEAY!! and guess what? my brain has gone a million miles a minute, thinking about all those what might gonna happen in the future and such adult stuff like buying an apartment lol. Yes thankyou, Im well aware of the "being an adult sucksssss, can I just go back to my childhood already" kinda thought. It's become a rarity to not getting myself into troubles, being stuck in a nightmare that Im no longer a kid and I have to drive this self into the right destination. Graduate from college means Im officially an adult and I have to take care of my own life all by myself:) Don't u think it's scary? the idea of being an adult and a mature human being and the fact that you have to face it whatever comes in the way. I even got that uneasy feeling while watching netflix and finishing my favorite rom-com series. can u imagine?? you cant even relax when you're supposed to feel relax in your leisure time. But Im happy tho, for being able to walk this far after all the low-lows and having someone by my side.
The journey was never been easy for me, but I know I can manage. Fast-forward to now, approaching my graduation day, some things are still blurry but I can sense good things are on its way. Well sometimes I still feel the worry, anxiety, and the overwhelming stress but I've become more aware of the flows of life and grown to be more sedated in my feelings. My outlook is not of hopeless anymore as I learn that indeed the darkness is bound to be met with the light. Everything's kinda make sense now. Thanks to me for still doing a good job to write things down, putting down the pen to my journal and capture the weight in my chest into words. It's been a source of warmth and comfort to me. Speaking of journey, I still have one more finals to face before I graduate. wish me luck!!
With that being said, there's a mix feeling in between. when you're in your early 20s and you still have so many list of I wanna do this, I wanna do that, I wanna go there, I wanna go here, I wanna buy this, I wanna buy that you feel like, okay I need to do something. that's the spirit which currently dancing inside my brain. Seeing other people in my age that's already being way more successful than I am sometimes kinda scares me:( haha I know, this life is not a race but... okay never mind we just need to focus on ourselves. It's totally okay to start small everyday, we all have our own timeline hihi. but please universe make my timeline as good as how I want it to be xixi
Anyway I've got vaccinated (first dose of Sinovac vaccine and gonna get the second shot next month) cause this global pandemic hasn't really gone yet. oh c'mon, dear pandemic get going real quick plssss ur not cool!! I hate u. I wanna meet my friends and I wanna go somewhere I've never been to, I still got so many list of places I want to visit. this pandemic really is making everyone insane:( it's been one and a half year of living side by side and trying to get over this pandemic. Stay healthy and sane everyone! I hope you are all doing just fine and eat well. dont forget ur vitamins and drink more water, ok?;) and always follow the health protocols #1 may this pandemic get over real soon
I think that's all for today, see ya on my next post xx
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