Tuesday, 18 July 2017

Build (again) the wall

When a night falls on my head
And the sky become darker
Feeling sad because the wall is gone
when the stars come out to play
That's when Im crying
I saw myself jumping out the cliff
Watching how much I lost
I tried to sleep under fear
with only my hand as my pillow
And the dark sky as my sheet
I kept telling myself and my mind it's okay
We are not that lose
We can build (again) the wall
As the rain washed away my tears
that cold June night
I stop crying
Yet I still think about the gone wall
I keep telling my self (again)
It'll be ok (eventually)
Ok then I said to my self
I promise I'll build my own wall
And turn on the light
Very soon

Friday, 14 July 2017

Morning chit chat between a dad and his daughter

Background and location: On one shining morning in the edge of a town, not so far away from the market, a girl sat down in the kitchen with her dad while her mum still busy cooking and prepare breakfast. Dad was enjoying his coffee. His daughter sat on his lap anyway. Daughter drank a cup of tea (sweet tea; for detail). 
"Dad may I ask you something?" She said as she drank her tea
Then her dad answer; "ask away my sweetie, ask away."
"What is 'real world', dad? Is it different from mine? Why do I don't know if there's an other world out there, maybe? Is it nice to live in real world, dad? Does other people know it already, dad, or is it just me who have no idea about the real world?"
"Oh sweetie, such a hard question to answer." Her dad said
"So neither of us know about the real world? i guess." The little girl (about 7 years old) said as she approach her mum that handed her a full plate of toast. 
"Well, my dear. Real world is just same as our, dear, the earth. It's always nice regardless where we live or who we are, as long as we can enjoy our life, no matter where we live, we could always be happy as well. Listen, sweetie, sometimes things are hard and far away from our expectation and sometimes thing disapoint us. That's life, my dear. Maybe you can relate it when you are older or above 17 I guess, but it's okay to learn about life earlier *smile*. There will come a moment when you feel sad, fail, afraid, fall, and many more things that lead us to giving up in any way. The key is always find a new hope and dream, sweetie, never ever giving up! no matter how hard your life is. Indeed, life is hard basically. But we have to face it, struggle, keep trying, and one more thing, live your life and be grateful." Her dad said
"My dear, people has their own challenge. So, if you have difficulties on your way, don't worry, there's people who might facing harder challenge. Good luck honey!" Her dad said

P.S not so interesting post I guess:(

Wednesday, 14 June 2017

My name is dream

Hey kid!
Where will you go? They  asked
Somewhere. She said
I beg your pardon, kid.
Somewhere far away from here
Hey kid!
Where are you going? They asked
Sky. She said
Im sorry?
Above the sky
Are you sure? They asked
Yes, I am. She said
Are you okay? They asked
No, Im not. She said
What's your name anyway, kid? They asked
My name is dream. She said

Tuesday, 6 June 2017

I fear 'fear'. She said

I look outside through a window from the coffee shop in the very heart of my town. The moonlight keep that night fully awake. And it was in the middle of May as I remember. That place is pleasant for me, I could hide from the bustling and let my mind take a deep joy breath. I brought my book that day as usual. My favourite is cappucino anyway but Im fancy white coffee lately. I used to steal drink my dad's coffee before breakfast (typical unhealthy kid) . After few hours I enjoyed my coffee and almost finish 4 chapters of my book, a girl staring into a chair in front of me. I gave her a little smile and she kinda approached me and sat on an empty chair ahead me. "Mind if I accompany you enjoy your coffee, not really tho. I mean sit down here. I couldn't find anywhere else to sit. Everywhere is full." She said as I stared at her. "That's ok, no wonder it's saturday night haha." I said

We didn't talk to much, just like what she said, just accompany me to enjoy my coffee. It's felt weird to drink coffee with a stranger who sat right in front of you without saying any word. So I decided to ask her random questions that appear on my head and we were about laughing together. All of sudden she asked me such a question but her explanation about her own question is beyond good. Well, she asked me "things I fear the most". And I was like why on earth she asked me that stuff.
"Er... shall I answer your question? Well umm, Im afraid of serpent thing, and err... crazy people, and maybe being lost in outer space." I said as I turn my book page.
"So you are afraid of snake? Hahaha." She kinda laughing at me with her funny and clean face (no pimples at all wow)
"well, kind of *chuckle* And how about you anyway?" I said.
"I fear 'fear'." She said.

It sounds weird at the beginning, but then she told me how fear could be worse than anything else and the thing that actually fear us is fear it self.
Well that's make sense I thought.

P.S after I reread that story above, I do feel it's a bit confusing, but whatever HAHAHA *evil face*

Saturday, 3 June 2017

Chapter eleven: The Sorting Hat's New Song

The whole school waited with bated breath. Then the rip near the hat's brim opened wide like a mouth and the Sorting Hat burst into song:

In times of old when I was new

And Hogwarts barely started

The founders of our noble school

Thought never to be parted:

United by a common goal,

They had the selfsame yearning,

To make the world's best magic school

And pass along their learning.

'Together we will build and teach!'

The four good friends decided

And never did they dream that they

Might some day be divided,

For were there such friends anywhere

As Slytherin and Gryffindor?

Unless it was the second pair

Of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw?

So how could it have gone so wrong?

How could such friendships fail?

Why, I was there and so can tell

The whole sad, sorry tale.

Said Slytherin, 'We'll teach just those

Whose ancestry is purest.'

Said Ravenclaw, 'We'll teach those whose

Intelligence is surest. '

Said Gryffindor, 'We'll teach all those

With brave deeds to their name, '

Said Hufflepuff, 'I'll teach the lot,

And treat them just the same. '

These differences caused little strife

When first they came to light,

For each of the four founders had

A house in which they might

Take only those they wanted, so,

For instance, Slytherin

Took only pure-blood wizards

Of great cunning, just like him,

And only those of sharpest mind

Were taught by Ravenclaw

While the bravest and the boldest

Went to daring Gryffindor.

Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest,

And taught them all she knew,

Thus the houses and their founders

Retained friendships firm and true.

So Hogwarts worked in harmony

For several happy years,

But then discord crept among us

Feeding on our faults and fears.

The houses that, like pillars four,

Had once held up our school,

Now turned upon each other and,

Divided, sought to rule.

And for a while it seemed the school

Must meet an early end,

What with duelling and with fighting

And the clash of friend on friend

And at last there came c morning

When old Slytherin departed

And though the fighting then died out

He left us quite downhearted.

And never since the founders four

Were whittled down to three

Have the houses been united

As they once were meant to be.

And now the Sorting Hat is here

And you all know the score:

I sort you into houses

Because that is what I'm for,

But this year I'll go further,

Listen closely to my song:

Though condemned I am to split you

Still I worry that it's wrong,

Though I must fulfil my duty

And must quarter every year

Still I wonder whether Sorting

May not bring the end I fear.

Oh, know the perils, read the signs,

The warning history shows,

For our Hogwarts is in danger

From external, deadly foes

And we must unite inside her

Or we'll crumble from within

I have told you, I have warned you ...

Let the Sorting now begin.

The Hat became motionless once more; applause broke out...

P.S which book is it? Your guess:p *chuckle* Potterhead can probably relate

Saturday, 27 May 2017

Ramadan kareem!!!

I rarely wrote about islamic  thing, so here we go. Im about writing Ramadan, a holy month for muslims all around the world. A year has passed, time flies so fast, really. It's seems only yesterday, now we are facing an other holy month, Ramadan. Alhamdulillah, Allah still give us a chance to face Ramadan this year. A proper time to repent our wrong doings and sin (well, we are basically a sinner). May Allah bless us and make our Ramadan full of happiness and joy. It's time to fasting, isn't? How about your prep? I hope it's went well. Cheer up guys, first day of fasting.
For me Ramadan would always be my fav month ever, reunited with my big family, being connected with old friends, I love the vibes when people are waiting for iftar hahaha (eat eat eat). I really am grateful for what Allah has given to me, about His bless trough every single phase of my life. Im 18 yo already so I think it's my 18th Ramadan *reckon what I've done about my existence*.

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا كُتِبَ عَلَيْكُمُ الصِّيَامُ كَمَا كُتِبَ عَلَى الَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ - 2:183

O you who have believed, decreed upon you is fasting as it was decreed upon those before you that you may become righteous (surah Al-Baqarah:183)

Like what people said, time goes on, and so do I, grow up. Time to move forward, do the right things, pray to tighten our faith. For my fangirls fellow may y'all be patient in avoiding read fanfic, read holy quran instead. and no more punk rock song cause we'll listening to playlist lagu religi. 
Well, let's start a new page of life. Wishing us a blessed and peaceful holy month of Ramadan, may Allah remove our sins and bad deeds.
Aamiin ya rabbal 'alamiin

Anyway a friend of mine just recommend me a very good app to keep on track about our ibadaah (worship) during Ramadan. It's ramadan legacy. So I suggest you to download it too;) go download them freely on app store or google play!

Ramadan mubarak for all my muslim brothers and sisters!

Wednesday, 24 May 2017

Talk about high school

I was officially graduated from high school on May 2nd, for me highschool is both best and worst part of my life. eversince the very first day of high school, I was being interest to observe who people truly are, and trying to find out what actually the meaning of life is. Highschool is neither about finding a boyfriend nor being the prom queen girl. It's absolutely more than just studying math or physics but it's about how do we start to make our life live. High school days made me realize that life is clearly tough and just getting harder. 
Being a not so-famous girl in highschool further took me into a place where I could learn how does society now a days work. People would give their life just to live the silly and cruel sterotype society judgement. I think Im mentally grow up after I realize being a highschool-er undeniably can suck, but Im pretty glad about the fact that life goes on. Life definitely must go on.

The best part about high school for me is, about the day I was trying to figure out what life truly is, it sound silly but indeed it's the most important one to prepare about future and do what the best I could. I learn lot of stuff during my school days, strugle, laugh, tears, suffer, guilty, etc. Im grateful, eventually I know it really is matter for me, that's all made me grow up and maturer. I already met much human characters, people are good but sometimes people can undeliberately make something bad just because they don't realize that everything's matter. Im not saying we should always do good and have no regret about life it self but it's all about TRYING to do good deeds. No matter how small it seems, a good one deed can make a better life. 
I always try to open my mind about anything and it does help me to see things differently and getting rid of stereotype society judgement. It is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply but Im grateful to be kind of a deep thinker person.

Sometimes, back in school days I asked my own self about my existence in high school, and I end up called my self as a not so-famous girl, but apparently Im mistaken. It's not about being noticed by society but that's all about make our existence matter, at least for our own self and help society it self. We can't force people to notice our existence but we could make our self realize how ignorant our society is. Since then I aware that being noticed by society is really not so important thing. Our dedication would be meaningless if we categorize our deed based on society standard.

Back again I’m pretty glad that life goes on when I feel like the worst part in higschool hit me so hardly (although I won't directly show it). In the end everything's matter. Isn't? 
Im really happy about every single memory I had in high school, Im grateful, I still got the chance to meet people I haven't met before, step one higher stage of life, I made one of my wildest dream when I was in highschool anyway, so the vibes about highschool perfectly will never leave my heart. 

Im about saying high school did make me mentally mature.