Saturday 1 May 2021

Distance

I know it's hard for you but dont you think that it's hard for me too? not being able to hug you when i know you need it the most, not being able to be there when you need me, not being able to show up at your door just to cheer you up when ure sad and tired, not being able to look into your eyes and telling you that everything is going to be okay when you are desperate about your business, not being able to whisper and telling you "hey we can get thru this" when college stuff seems so overwhelming, not being able to punch you in the face or kick your ass😠 when you're being so lazy and procrastinate a lot, not being able to comfort you when you are at the hospital, not being able to even meet you when i miss you so bad, not being able just to have lunch or hang out with you just because the distance is just so far away. Do you know how worried i was when you got sick and i didnt hear anything from you? How worried i was when i ask you "are u okay" but didnt get any reply? I was worried about you, cause i know there's nothing i could do but calling and texting and praying. 

Do you think it's easy for me to resist the feeling of missing you everyday? You just dont know how much i worry about you when you were there alone at the hospital and knowing that i was just being useless here and couldnt do anything about it cause we were and still two hundreds KM apart. I know it's hard and i know the distance is just too painful to both of us. Im sorry, i wish i could do a thing about it. For now maybe we could only be there for each other virtually, but there's more awaits in the future and it could be distance too. We've been separated by distance all this time, dont make it even harder. We can do it.

But do you know what's good about distance? The fact that we could appreciate presence more. We may only meet once in three or four months but I could sense how much we value those short meetings, even if it's just a day or two. I know you sacrificed a lot just to show up visiting me here in town. With your workload that is as high as the burj khalifa and your grand masterplan to start a business, i know how much things that you keep aside just to make time with me and to buy me my favorite ice cream. And i thank you for that. It's been two months since the last time we met, and we need another month to wait until we both could finally meet again only for another two or three days worth of meeting. See you on the next date, eh?